Brigham Young University
When it was over, the usual guilt and shame began to set in. Part of it was the realization that I was too weak and perverse to avoid committing grave sins and wanting to commit graver ones. Another part of it was the thought that I had somehow overstepped my boundaries and misused another person. Perhaps he would be disgusted if he knew what I had imagined for him. After all, I was just a nerdy girl who had had a few dates in high school, but never a serious boyfriend. Perhaps my fantasies were all I would ever have.
I thought about what would happen if I were ever in such a situation for real. In various seminars and devotionals for youth they have told us many times to plan in advance in order to be ready to stop and step away before going too far. I had planned in a sense. I knew what I should do. And yet I also knew what I would do.
On the bright side, after taking care of this little problem I found I was better able to concentrate on my reading. I read the entire introductory section so I knew what the main points were, and from there I figured out which scenes were the key scenes to read thoroughly. There was some cool stuff in there. Before I knew it, Janie arrived back at our dorm room with Trisha and Lavyrne gathering our friends to go to dinner.
Cindy wasn't at dinner with us because she was off on her big date with Hyrum. I'd missed seeing her set off all decked-out and gorgeous, but I'd seen her all done up for dates before, and it was a sight to behold. I was looking forward to hearing about it the next day.
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