1. And where did he serve his mission?
2. A warm October day down by the Provo River
3. Orem's not so bad when you give it a chance
4. I can rely on myself
5. Jared gets drunk and gets laid
6. Forget about her, Jared
7. A story I never tell anyone

• (character chart)
• Warning/Disclaimer

1. Young Women's
2. Youth Conference
3. Saturday's Warrior
4. Brigham Young University
• Gratuitous Love Scene
5. Polygamist
6. Temple Wedding
7. Orem High
8. Bordeaux Mission
9. Exmo Conference

Four A.M.

I woke up on the floor. I felt really thirsty and had to pee. The T.V. was still on but not making any noise. Someone must have muted it at some point. I stood up and looked at Tanya lying there asleep on the couch. I felt confused and wanted to go home.

I went upstairs to try to find the bathroom. I saw by the clock on the wall that it was four in the morning. I was supposed to be home by midnight! I figured I was in big trouble.

I found the bathroom and turned on the light. Kim was lying there passed-out on the floor. There was vomit everywhere. The whole bathroom reeked of it. The smell of it made me a little queasy, but it also made me notice that I didn't really feel sick myself. No headache, no nausea. I didn't feel drunk anymore either. I figured I must not have drank as much as I'd thought I had.

I wasn't sure what to do about going to the bathroom. I really had to pee, and I didn't know where to find another bathroom in the house. I wondered if maybe I should just do it with Kim there on the floor. She was unconscious so she wouldn't know the difference. In the end I decided to pick her up and carry her into the living room and lay her down on the couch. Fortunately she was pretty light. I wasn't sure that that was the best thing to do -- in case she had to throw up again -- but I figured at least she'd be more comfortable there.

I went back and went to the bathroom and then drank about five or six glasses of water.

All I could think about was how I had to get home. I figured I was okay to drive since I really didn't feel drunk or buzzed at all anymore.

In the car on the way home I started thinking about what I'd done. I couldn't figure out if it was good or bad. It was maybe a little of both. I was happy to finally have some experience -- and what an incredible experience it was! But then I thought that there might be some consequences. I wondered if maybe I shouldn't have done that, but it seemed like it would have taken an awful lot of will-power not to.

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I started really hoping that I wasn't wrong about God not existing and all because I would hate to imagine what the big guy would have to say about this.

When I got home, I unlocked the door as quietly as possible. I went straight to my room and slipped into bed without making a sound.

In the morning, I got up and went to the bathroom and got dressed. The door to Kathy's old room was open, and I could hear that there was someone inside. I looked in and saw that it was Rex. He was alone and already dressed, arranging some things in his suitcase.

"Rex, I'm so glad to see you again!" I said, running up to give him a hug.

He was a little surprised, but said "I'm glad to see you, too, kiddo."

"Rex, I really need to talk to you about something," I said, taking a seat on the bed. "Well that was fast!" he said. "I just got here and already you need to talk to me. Won't you have a seat?" he said jokingly, and he sat down next to me. "What's up?" he asked.

"Something happened last night, and I'm afraid I may have done the wrong thing."

"What happened?"

"Well, you see, there's this girl I really like," I began.

Rex chuckled. "Why do these stories always begin this way?" he asked, knowingly. "Sorry to interrupt. Go on."

"Well, this girl and her friend were having a party at her friend's house because her friend's parents were out of town. I was really looking forward to it because I figured that I could get together with the girl I liked. Anyway, what happened was that right at the beginning of the party the cute girl told me that it wasn't going to work out between us and that she wasn't going to ever be with me. But she didn't tell me why. Then she just up and left. I didn't know most of the other people at the party very well, but they offered me some beer and then a bunch of tequila shots, and I didn't feel like turning them down."

"Seems reasonable," said Rex.

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