1. He's perfect for the part
2. You're my obsession
3. A question of morality
4. Could I really love a man who could do something like this?
5. A problem and a solution
6. A favor for a friend
7. The grace period
8. Trying to make things right again
9. The sort of spiritual experience eternal companions should share

• (character chart)
• (caution/disclaimer)

1. Young Women's
2. Youth Conference
3. Saturday's Warrior
4. Brigham Young University
• Gratuitous Love Scene
5. Polygamist
6. Temple Wedding
7. Orem High
8. Bordeaux Mission
9. Exmo Conference

Friday morning

When I woke up, Jake was already in the shower. I rested in bed listening to the water and gathering my strength.

Jake came out of the bathroom in his boxers and started getting dressed. "Well? You'd better get up and take your shower," he said. "You've got a big day ahead of you."

In truth I was terrified even after Jake explained that this morning's appointment was just the warm-up.

I got myself ready, and we got on the bike and went to the clinic. The building wasn't too impressive. It was a squat little rectangular one-story building. More than anything else it reminded me of the veterinarian's office where we would take our cat. Of course it wasn't the same. I saw the place as somehow cold and sinister even though I knew intellectually that they were there to help me and I was lucky to have them.

As we got off the bike started walking up to the building, Jake put his arm around me as if to support and protect me. I could just imagine what this must look like -- a biker tough in his leather jacket and black boots escorting a young girl into this sort of place. To most people it wouldn't look like anything good. Yet Jake put himself in this position despite the fact that it wasn't his responsibility at all. No one had ever before given me such a strong impression of manliness and courage.

When it was time for my appointment with the counselor, she started in immediately on explaining to me the importance of using a condom. I felt really stupid and humiliated because of course I knew I should have used one, and I couldn't bring myself to lie and say that it was just that the condom had broken or something. I felt almost on the verge of tears, but I tried to be as normal and nonchalant as possible as she gave me some condoms and demonstrated how to use one by putting it on a banana. In truth, I had never done it, so if I hadn't felt so emotionally distraught by the whole thing, I would have been grateful for the instruction.

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When my session was over, they had me sign some forms and pay my money, and they gave me a card with the time of my appointment the next morning and an envelope full of some sort of pamphlets. That was it for that appointment, so Jake took me back to the hotel.

I felt so shaken already and was so filled with dread for the next day that I found that all I wanted to do was lie down on the bed.

"Well, that didn't take too long," said Jake. "And now we have a full day to have fun in Vegas. Let's go hit the casinos."

"I don't know," I said.

"Come on. It'll take your mind off of all of this, and we'll have some fun. Remember, your older brother specifically instructed you to have fun," he said smiling.

"Jake, you know I'm only fifteen," I said. "If I go with you, I'll just get us both thrown out of any casinos we visit and you know it."

"Well, what do you want to do then?" he asked.

"I think that you should go enjoy visiting the casinos, and I should just hang out here at the hotel and rest."

"Leave you here all alone all day to sit and contemplate your situation?" he asked. "I don't know that I can do that. Look, if you don't feel up to going out, I can stay here with you, and we can do some calm, non-stressful things like take a walk around the neighborhood."

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