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Saturday's Warrior
  1. He's perfect for the part
  2. You're my obsession
  3. A question of morality
  4. Could I really love a man who could do something like this?
  5. A problem and a solution
  6. A favor for a friend
  7. The grace period
  8. Trying to make things right again
  9. The sort of spiritual experience eternal companions should share
Exmormon
  1. Young Women's
  2. Youth Conference
  3. Saturday's Warrior
  4. Brigham Young University
  5. Polygamist
  6. Temple Wedding
  7. Orem High
  8. Bordeaux Mission
  9. Exmo Conference
Saturday's Warrior

Friday evening

The babysitting job that I was splitting with Joy was at the house of the Jensens, who were non-members. It was fun having Joy along for a job like this one since it was one where the kids went to bed right off the bat, and all we had to do was hang out and be there to make sure nothing bad happened to them while their parents were gone.

This was a fantastic task since the Jensen's house was full of tempting delights. I almost would have been willing to pay to spend the evening there if I weren't being paid to do it.

First and foremost, the Jensens had cable. Our family could have afforded cable, but my dad hated TV on principle -- he was always telling us how it rots our brains whenever he caught us watching it -- so he certainly wasn't going to pay to have more television options piped in. I didn't care so much for TV that I was terribly disappointed about not having cable in general. What interested me was that in the evening cable meant the forbidden pleasure of R-rated movies.

At church they were reminding us practically every other week about how watching rated R movies is a sin, particularly ones that are full of nudity and sex, which were the only ones I wanted to watch. So on some level I felt like I shouldn't be doing it. But the opportunity didn't arise every single day, so on those occasions when I had the opportunity, I couldn't bring myself to pass it up.

Also, I felt less bad about it knowing that Joy was the same way. She was always willing and ready to join me for this sort of entertainment.

As soon as the kids were in bed, we put on a promising-looking movie. The film itself looked pretty stupid actually, so we just kind of ran it softly in the background waiting for the good parts. In the meantime, we started in on Mrs. Jensen's stack of back issues of Cosmopolitan magazine.

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EXMORMON

It seemed like every single issue of Cosmo had at least one article about sex. They were mostly various types of advice and suggestions. I couldn't really judge whether the advice was any good or not, but I learned quite a lot about how the whole thing worked by piecing together tidbits from the different articles. Plus the sex articles were full of amusing sexual anecdotes. I hardly cared what point this or that anecdote was supposed to illustrate. As long as it was kind of erotic, it was interesting.

The other marvelous wonder they had at the Jensen's house was this book called The Joy of Sex. If there were any gaps left in the sex education Joy and I were getting from Cosmo and nudie flicks, this book certainly went a long way towards filling them in. It amazed me that such a book could even exist. It was basically full of diagrams of people having sex in all sorts of positions. I figured it wasn't really pornography since it was just drawings. Every one was fascinating, and I'm sure I would have been happy to look at the book all day given the chance.

When the movie got to the good part, we turned up the volume and watched. It turned out that it was about some boys off at camp who snuck over to a nearby girls' camp and attempted to spy on the girls in the shower, etc. Some nonsense, really, but I found it riveting and arousing. In fact it was quite a standard fantasy. When we were at girls' camp there were a number of camp songs centered on this same theme that the girls would sing when there were no adult leaders around to make us stick to the wholesome songs. Unfortunately in all my years at girls' camp there'd never been a boys' camp nearby enough for such an excursion. Just a bunch of girls sitting around talking about boys and giggling.

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